7days..

Its been a week,
Hell long time if u ask me.
The random tears, Ocassional spacing out, Weird Laughter, Lonliness...
Just part n parcle of a break up?
At least i know i'm not alone. He's feeling it too..

Last night was the worst amongst the whole week.
Finally The only moment where i was alone,
(was when i was in the showers.)
I burst out in tears..
It was the only time when no one was arnd.
its ALREADY a week??.. how long more will that last?

As i lay wide awake in bed,
Pillow soaked with tears,
I msged him.
It wasnt the only msg i typed to him in the past week.
However, it was the only one that got sent.
I'd type long msgs, only to find myself deleting them..
This time round, i sent it out...
I could only manage a goodnight msg.

USELESS!! argh..

He felt my hurt nevertheless.
Told him it was a week, n just a plain goodnite..
He felt it.. replied a long msg, (which he usually wont)
We use to had this thing,
where we just KNEW how each other felt.
As usual.. he felt it this time.
We had this connection.
Now that we arent together, i wish this connection wld go away.
Only thing it brings now.. is Unwanted Unhappiness.

Perhaps thats why sometimes i just feel this pang of sadness
rush of tears...
Wherever he is.. Maybe he's feelin that way..

A friend told me to give it one more shot.
I know i cant.
I shouldnt.
He doesnt want to anyway.
The future's............. there's no future. *i'm denying it*
I drifted off to bed.......

Got up in early morning,
only to realize that i was part of an equally awful dream.
I dreamt of him, n myself.
A dream of parting.. A dream of him rejecting me,
pushing me furthur n furthur away..
EVEN IN MY DREAM!!!
i'm UNABLE to escape from the harsh reality.

GIVE me a moment of serenity!!!
i dont require pure joy n happiness
I just want a moment of PEACE,
where thoughts dont flood my mind on its own..

The only time i do find it,
is when i'm occupied.
Occupied wld i be then!

Unlike other couples...
we seldom tookphotos..
Thats good.
Now when i miss him, there's nothing much that i can refer to



V-day 05.. Myself, My fave Flowers. From my Fave him...

Cant bring myself to post a pic of him.
cant bring myself to think of him.
sigh.

Tonight's gona b a busy night.
Now that's a consolation

one more.....

Xmas party we organized..
Were we went to ikea.. Were we got the drinks..
where prisc was with geoff
where chris was with ivan
where lyd was still in SG

where i was with him...