Tears at last.

dont complain about me not blogging k?... here i am, BLOGGING NOW!

and i'm in tears, looking really bad, blowing my nose out, wif mascarra comming off. It seems like it isnt that water proof after all!

it started off with me being in a bad mood, and stupid me, had to juz msg james to tell him im in a bad mood. after which, asked why, and i obviously dont know why!!!! if i know i would tell.. but val doesnt! how 2 telL!?!?! so his last msg went "ayah, u dont wish to say den nvm. i go slp ler. nitez" after that, i msged him called him... NO REPLY!!!!!!!

walaOoo i'm like left hanging there now lar! and i think i'm seriously so depressed! at least reply me to say he's ok.. etc. FINE, he msged me 2 say he's gona slp already.. so he's prolly slping. but still..... i dont feel at ease!

Feeling PMSsy.... PMS was never an excuse i gave myself. NEVER. guess now i really have to credit it ALLL to pms. i feel so volatile... i havent cried in ages. aaaagggeeesss. it was quite hard to get the tears rolling, but YES, now that its started, it cant stop.

AND I"M HUNGRY!!! i'm hungry n i'm upset, i'm tired, n i'm so lazy to shower!. what can be worst!? i cannot take hunger. i simply cant. once i'm hungry i'd be in a bad mood. and i can eat less, but i cant dont eat. :( i'm so upset now.... i'm so hungry, n i feel like eating supper... but i cant. cuz i'm trying to lose weight!

GosHhh all this nonsensical ranting.. swear i'm gona faint if i read them again. but hell no!!! i'm juz gona continue. Doubt james even reads it in the first place. im having a sore throat already... my throat's feeling all sore. =( think i'm being too demanding as a gf. im sorry. if im bad. dump me.

OH WHAT THE HELL AM I SAYING!!! i dont want him to do that!!! fine.. i'm suffering a lil frm inferiority complex.. so what... i dont think im good enough loR.... and so happens i've got a bf who doesnt express that well. HENCe my stupid brain running in all directions.

So why the hell do i care how others view me!? not OTHERs. it's my bf. i care for his opinion. hence my current trauma. i tink.. im really getting too concerned bout his words.sometimes i read too much into his meaning. he juz said he was gona slp! he's not ignoring u val!!! WAKE UP!!!

Priscy... Key.. where are u!!?? :( val just feels upset. no reason. really really no particular reason.... trust me when i say that.... James, wont u just get up, msg me.. and let me smile to bed tonight!?

I'M HUNGRY!!!!! i'd juz keep crying till i feel betta... emotionally at least.. useless me. Yes i know. so what. will u still love me for me? Its really true that i dont know wats goin through ur mind at times james. :(